Dimona

During the first week of February I traveled to Jordan to visit a friend living in Amman before the semester at Birzeit University started. The day before I intended to travel to the Israeli-manned border crossing I became aware of the bombing attack by two Palestinians on a shopping mall in Dimona. The attack was carried out by two suicide bombers who had entered Gaza through Egypt and then subsequently into southern Israel. 1 Israeli woman was killed and 11 others wounded. This marked the first suicide attack in Israel in over a year.

I postponed my journey to the border an extra day to avoid the delays and increased security checks at the crossing, and found myself deeply disturbed by the attacks. The Israeli and American media largely attributed the attacks to the destroyed border fence between Egypt and the Gaza Strip, talked of the possibility of a ground operation in Gaza, and spouted cliches along the lines of "the terrorists hate our freedom." The woman and 11 other wounded Israelis became excuses to discuss Israeli security policy and the "War on Terror." The two Palestinian murderers were cast as truly evil and mindless men ruled by an irrational hatred of Jews and a strict obedience to Islam. Just 14 more statistics in the world's favorite propaganda war.

International activists and strong supporters of the Palestinian cause used the occasion to highlight the fact that one year had passed without a suicide bombing in Israel, arguing that regardless of the frequency of attacks Israel had not eased the effects of the occupation on the populace. They pointed out that more Palestinian civilians had indeed been killed that day than Israelis, that the ratio of dead is as high as 10:1, depending on when you begin counting. They used the dead to talk about the harsh and oppressive conditions for the Palestinians in the occupied territories, especially the Gaza Strip. Some used the disgusting euphemism "martyrdom bombing" when referencing the killing - a term I will NEVER use and vigorously oppose of.

I found almost nobody in the worldwide press who lamented the murder for the ones that were killed and wounded and condemned the bloody actions of the day/week/month/year/past 60 years. More dead Jews in a shopping mall. More dead Palestinians crushed beneath the rubble of their homes. Why could not anyone stand up and say, "Enough, these actions - every action that continues this conflict - are wrong and should be opposed by anyone who values human life!" Instead the victims are always forgotten and attributed to an intractable conflict Americans couldn't care less about.

Who deserves the blame? Everyone. The British of 100 years ago for thinking they could carve up the world to their liking - breaking promises they never intended to keep. Olmert and Abbas for leaving Annapolis with empty hands and saying, "we'll have a solution by the end of 2008, we're peacemakers!" Every drop of blood spilled this year is on their hands. Israelis for not standing up and telling their government to end the occupation and find a peaceful solution. Palestinians for not standing up and collectively opposing anyone or any group that commits violent attacks in Israel. American politicians for not pushing Israel hard enough to make peace. George W. Bush for trumpeting his role in the peace process and then letting everyone down through his always-present bumbling incompetence. Yasser Arafat for being a corrupt, petty, and thoroughly stupid leader. Ariel Sharon for being a racist madman. The media in general for using dead bodies as an excuse to talk policy and bring in "experts" on terrorism and miliant Islam. You for turning the page when you see the article in the newspaper, or turning the channel when the story comes on the 5:00 news. Everytime you say, "they'll never get along, they've been fighting for thousands of years," you damn another innocent caught in the middle to death. Me for not having any kind of real plan as to what I am personally going to do to help bring peace for both sides.

Killing civilians is evil. I rarely use that word because of all the baggage that comes along with it, but I cannot think of a strong enough word at the present. Whether they're blow up in an Israeli pizzeria or by a bomb in their homes, evil is evil. A term nearly as horrific as "martyrdom bombing?" "Collateral Damage." Killing is killing. Murder is murder. I don't care if an accused militant who at one point fired a weapon at Israeli soldiers is killed in the blast. That 5 month old little girl is dead and whoever ordered that missile strike should rot in hell. This conflict is about death and destroyed lives. Dreams that will never ever come true because someone in a suit and tie decided another man needed to die. Lives and families blown apart because some man filled with hatred strapped a bomb to himself and looked innocent children in the eyes and pushed the detonator.

I'm not here primarily because I want a state for the Palestinian people. I am here because I want this conflict to come to a conclusion. The Palestinians talk of justice, the Israelis of security. When will they come together, with tears in their eyes for the ones who have died, and talk peace?

Of course I dream for the day, far in the future, when Israelis and Palestinians will come to Jerusalem and celebrate peace. Where pictures of dead children won't be used to make a political point. I care about the conflict because my tax dollars encourage it. Because my president says he wants peace and instead wages war. Because the missiles, tanks, and helicopters that destroy people's lives are stamped with "Made in the USA." But mostly I care about the conflict because I value human lives, dreams, and hopes. Every bullet fired by either side is a failure of the human spirit.

Missile attacks and suicide bombings destroy more than just lives. They destroy a chance for peace. They undermine the Israeli and Palestinian peace movements. They fill others with hate and an appetite for revenge. They desecrate the memories of those who have fought and died for peace. In the flash and smoke and sound of every explosion hope for a better tomorrow disappears.